Motivation. Get it!

My one and only class that I am taking this semester, the class that brings me to graduation, is the best class ever.

I'm taking novel writing, which is great because I want to write novels, and I can use all the help I can get.

But its great because, I've only had three classes so far, and I'm already super motivated to get this first book down. My thoughts are so much clearer than they've ever been about any idea before, and I know way more about my book than I ever thought I'd know.

I had started working on it over the summer, but I got run down and tired because I didn't know where I was going. Now, I'm fairly certain I do, and I think it might actually turn out okay.

All I have to do now, is stop talking about it and start writing. And I'm totally motivated, so that's what I'm going to do. Wish me luck!

Having a Yard is Hard Work... Even if it's Really Small

I can't feel my legs...

This morning, my boyfriend decided to wake up at 7am for, Lord knows what reason, and because of this, I woke up too. After watching a little TV and eating breakfast, I decided that today seemed like a good day to garden.
off to Lowes.

I originally planned to buy a bunch of flowers and plant a beautiful garden so I would have something pretty to look at (when I finally get my porch furniture, heh).

This is what I bought:
A big bag of mulch, a bag of garden soil, romaine lettuce plants, squash plants, pumpkin plants, cantaloupe plants, carrot seeds, spinach seeds, watermelon seeds, sunflower seeds, tomato seeds, a shovel, and a hoe.
Sometimes plans change.

After Lowes, I immediately went to work.

Three hours later, I had planted two whole sides of my yard and felt like I was going to pass out. So I came inside and took a shower and I practically turned my tub black. Who knew gardening could be so messy! Anyway, as I'm showering, my arms start to feel really heavey and I can barely even wash myself.

Now I'm just laying around and wondering if I'll be able to make it to class tonight. For some reason my legs wont stop tingling. It's not like I had to do much work. I pretty much just squatted the whole time... maybe that's why my legs are tingly.

On top of this, I now have an awkward sunburn on my back from the shirt I was wearing. Sweet. At least I now have a yummy fruit vegetable garden :) can't wait for my veggies to bloom. Yay!
Cantaloupes: 

Squash, pumpkin and lettuce, all the way in the back:

Oh, and PS, I foud a bunch of clay in the soil in my yard, so I made a ceramic pot... It's pretty bad ass.

If I Had More Money, Honey

So yesterday was my first actual payday since I started working... Well at least the first one that didn't have to go directly towards paying for rent. I already spent half...

But I did put some in my savings and I do still have a little spending money left. It had just been so long since I had money, that I had to go on a spending spree! It all happened so fast, and then, the next thing I new, nearly half my money had been spent. I should try to be more careful.

I must say though. It feels great to have a full tank of gas and a house full of food for the first time in, I don't even know how long. Hurray! :)

Is it sad that I just got paid yesterday/today, and I already cant wait till next pay day? It's like I'm constantly looking forward to/ stressing about the next time I get paid. Money's just so easy to spend very quickly. I used to think that if I had a lot of money, that I wouldn't know how to spend it and that it'd probably last me a long time. Now I know that any amount of money that came my way would be spent instantly. There are just so many things to buy. Things I want, Things I need, Things other people want and need that I want to provide for them, homless people, charities, random food outings, binge drinking, and just so much more.

my plan for now is to put a little money into improving my apartment. I think I'll start with the garden :)

super stoked. Yay for home improvement!

Food for Thought

"Never regret. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it’s experience."
- Victoria Holt

"Wherever you go, go with all your heart."
- Confucius

"Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will"
- Zig Ziglar

"Let no man pull you low enough to hate him"
- Martin Luther King

"It always seems impossible until it's done"
-Nelson Mandela

"All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them"
-Walt Disney

Two Steps Forward... No More Steps Back... (I Hope)

Today I will be turning in my application for Graduation! :) so excited. I'm that much closer to being a college graduate.

Of course I had to fill the application out 3 times because I kept messing up... nerves I guess. Then again, I usually screw up on forms anytime I have to fill them out.

Now all I have to do is:
Finish my last class with a passing grade (preferably an A)
Get a cap and gown (however you do that... I'll figure it out)
Buy a graduation dress (gotta look pretty for grad pics!)
Look up any other graduation information that I need to know
Pay off all my debts to the school
and...
Well, I'm not sure about what else, but I'm sure I'll figure it out as time presses on.

YAY!   :)

Quitters Never Prosper

Why is life so hectic?

I feel like I barely have time for anything...

I guess working 80 hours a week, going to school and trying to write for the school paper doesn't help. And having a social life... it either doesn't happen, or I risk falling short of my goals and responsibilities.

The jobs are great, I need the money. It's the extra stuff that's creating the stress. - School I can handle. I've been doing that for 16 years. The social life makes things difficult, but it also temporarily relieves me of my stresses, which is a good thing. Right?. I'm thinking it's the paper. I would really like to do it, but it's so much added stress to my life that I don't really want. I have deadlines, and I have to meet with people for interviews, and I have to write, edit, and rewrite. Then I have to rewrite and re-edit. And then, sometimes I have to still do it again. At least, that's been my experience with my first story, which still hasn't even run yet.

I think writing for my school paper would most likely have some long term benefits for me in my potential future career... but does that make it worth all the stress it adds to my waking life that could potentially cause health problems, emotional problems, and a decrease in the pleasure I get out of writing. It could even ruin my love for writing, right? - It's just not the kind of writing that I want to be doing. I don't want to be a reporter. I don't want to have to investigate things that I don't know or care about so people can read probably the first few lines and then scrap it. It just seems like a lot of work for not so much benefit. Especially because no matter what, I wont be able to get more than a semesters worth of experience.

Does wanting to quit make me a slacker? Does it make me a failure? Is it a bad idea? Should I just force myself to do it even though as I'm sitting here thinking about my next story I'm also thinking about how much I really don't want to do it?

When I first signed up, I was really genuinely excited. And now, I've written only one story (which as I said before still hasn't even run) and I'm already sick of it... Is it because I haven't seen any results yet? Because I haven't received that instant gratification that I love so much? I don't know. All I know is that my next story is due Tuesday at 11 AM and I haven't even e-mailed and potential interviews yet. And on top of that, I have to work all day tomorrow, Sunday, Monday and Tuesday, so, Lord only knows when I would even be able to meet with anyone.


It's just too much.

But I'm still going to try... I don't want to be a quitter anymore.

Extension?

I'm quite possibly the worst blogger on the planet...

well, that and my summer semester proved to be busier than expected. I only took two classes, but both both of them somehow managed to take up nearly all of my time.

Unfortunately, graduation has slipped through my fingers and rrun just a little farther away from my grasp. I have yet another semester to go. With only one class left, I will most definitely be graduating in December (fingers crossed). Today is the first day of class, and my second class wont be until next Monday. (It's a once a week meeting class).

This all seems pretty easy. But then add in two jobs that require me to be on my feet all day and an unpaid position on the school newspapers news staff, and we're looking at a pretty hectic semester.

But I know I can do it, and I'm excited. I'm finally on my way to actually getting somewhere.

A trip to the career center over the summer helped me devise a plan.

Goal 1: Clime the editing career track and become a world renowned editor. (Based on my last entry from way back when, it doesn't seem like I'd be very good at it, heh), but I'm determined and I really want this to be where I end up.

Goal 2: Be a writer of some sort, be it a book author, or a columnist or a writer for a magazine or something to do with writing in any way/shape/form. That would be nice.

Goal 3: Be an English teacher... This is my back up plan. so basically, if I'm a failure at life, I'll be an English teacher. Okay fine, not a failure at life, but a failure at getting what I want. And I certainly don't want that to happen. Not that I would be unhappy as a teacher, but it's just not my first choice of profession... not anymore.


So, clearly my direction has changed a bit. When I first started this blog at the beginning of the year, being a teacher was my main and pretty much only goal. I guess things change. And so they did.

Okay, ready, set, go! Last semester of college, Here, I, Come!